Court in the Middle

The Quest for Sunday Roast and a Beer

2010-08-21T04:27:00.005+10:00

Pork is bad...m'kay:
So the UAE is a strictly Islamic country right? But everything is available for a price if one is to ask the right people... Take Pork for instance. Strictly banned (Haram) under Muslim law but walk into any Spinneys or Waitrose (UK supermarkets) in Dubai, ask for the "Pork Room" and you can go into a seperate room stocking all pork products.
Now this Pork Room often has some strange items in it (Pop Tarts and Marshmellows spring to mind..) but the argument is that some pork bypass products are used in their production. Marshmellows? Really? Think I prefered not knowing that kind of info.

**** Disclaimer****
In the event that you are the police or Immigration, the below story is a work of fiction. Okay... carry on.

The Barracuda Run:
So just like Pork can be obtained in this land of contradictions, so can alcohol. I think I have mentioned here before how one must get a license, involving getting a No Objection letter from the employer, permission from husband etc etc...

Well let's just say (hypothetically of course) you haven't gotten around to getting your license yet. There exists a little place in the middle of the freaking desert(!!!) called The Barracuda. One drives for an hour and a half out of Dubai through the desert on a road called E311. "When you see a big rusted looking warehouse and a Russian IL76aircraft smashed into the side of the road you have found it." (These were the exact directions I was given!)

The outside looks liks the aforementioned shed. Then pass the stacked shopping trolleys at the entrance and one could be mistaken for thinking they were at a Liquor Barn anywhere in Australia.

It was massive!!

And the prices?? Oh.My.God!

I bought (with cash of course... you don't want to use a UAE credit card here trust me) for under $90 AUD:
1. 1 litre of Absolut Vodka Mango
2. 700ml Johnny Walker Red Scotch
3. Oyster Bay sauv Blanc
4. some other French red
5. carton of Heineken
6. carton of Budweiser

So far so good... now to get it back into Dubai without getting arrested. This involved us wrapping the alcohol in towels and hiding in the wheel hold (empty) of my.. I mean this fictious person's SUV.

A few photos:

The road to the Barra:

The inside of the 'warehouse' taken sneakily with iphone:

A few choice items for sale:

In addition the famous Barracuda Run (which is what expat commonly call their trip out there), there is also the Barrcuda Bandit. This is scary..

In order to get from Umm al-Qaiwain (several Emirates over) back to Dubai, one must pass through Sharjah. Sharjah is like the Saudi of the UAE: women pretty much are all 'covered' and they tolerate very little. ie no alcohol. The E311 passes through Sharjah for about 4km or so. Many people returning from a Barrcuda Run have fallen victim to a scammer nicknamed the Barracuda Bandit. Basically these are two local men driving a very expensive and high powered 7 Series BMW (white in colour) that gets tipped off from staff at the Barra as to how is carrying what. They tailgate the car down the E311 once it enters Sharjah and clips them causing a minor accident. Once they pull over, the local man will offer to not call the police but ask that the driver escort him to the ATM and give him 10,000AED (about $3000). Most will do this as the punishment for carrying alcohol in Sharjah is prison and deportation.

The way around this is to call the Bandits bluff (especially if there is no alcohol visible) or avoid Sharjah completely by exiting E311 and going via another road. Another theory is to tip the guy that carries your alcohol to the car well (as it is suspected that he is the one on cahoots with the Bandit)

This of course could well be Dubai Urban Legend as everyone knows 'someones friend' that was scammed, but no one knows someone directly themselves. So who knows!

But for us on this particular adventure, all's well that ends well!

We made it home, breathed a sigh of relief and toasted each other as offical Dubai Expats and possible criminals. We enjoyed a fabulous pork roast the other night complete with crackling and gravy.

It was delicious!

A Night in Doha, Qatar

2010-08-14T16:08:00.003+10:00

Last week Alex and I decided to go out for lunch- destination unknown. As we drove roughly north heading towards Ras al Kaihmah, we drove past Dubai Terminal 2- the budget airline terminal of the Middle East. Wouldn't it be fun, we joked, to go into the airport and get a ticket on whatever is showing first on the departure board?

As Kabul, Afganastan was the next flight out, we decided we could fudge the rules of the game a bit and take the second on the list- Doha, Qatar. Quick line up at the FlyDubai counter, phone call home to the nanny to say we won't be home for dinner and another call to work to book us a hotel and we were off!!

Here are a few photos of the 12 hours we spent away:

The downtown area

The old town

Loads of things for sale ranging from the bizare to the even more bizare:

Then there are little men to help carry your purchases on their wheelbarrows

and finally... sorry, but couldn't resist taking this photo to further the Wests view and ignorance of the East :lol: :lol:

My Pet Peeve at the Hairdressers..

2009-07-15T18:49:00.006+10:00

No- it isn't the outrageous cost (although the price for a cut and colour and blow dry is on par with the GDP of a small African nation) but with the hair washer.

The young girl (for they are almost always young and female) assigned to do the wash and condition of your hair has clearly been trained poorly in ESP or.. quite frankly, common sense.

I will set the scene for you: after two (child free) hours at the salon being painted and cut and prodded and quite possibly waxed, you get sent over to the basin for the final wash and condition. Wash goes well- then the part of the whole ordeal you have been anticipating most- the conditioning treatment with the scalp massage. Ahhhh bliss!! Well Bliss for about two nanoseconds before the apprentice hair dresser opens her mouth:

Her: SO... anything planned for the weekend

Me: hmmph (thinking: shut up!)

Her: going clubbing or anything like that?

Me: hmmmph (thinking: last time I went 'clubbing' was circa 1991 and even then I didn't call it that. Please for the love of god shut up!)

Her: I am using a new conditioner today especially formulated for dry scalp

Me: please, please be quiet

Her: Pardon? I couldn't hear you over the music? I just LOVE this song! Last night, my girlfriends and I were singing to it REALLY loudly, and it was SO funny and then.....

Me: ARGH!!!

Seriously- any wannabe hairdressers out there take note. Be quiet during the head massage.

It may prevent me from clubbing you over the head with the nearest GHD

That is all......

My latest Love is hard, red and metal...

2009-07-14T14:08:00.003+10:00

and cooks.

Sounds perfect right? Well if it cleaned, then I swear I would marry it too. I am of course talking about my new shiny Empire Red Kitchen Aid.

Since going on maternity leave (and watching way too many episodes of Master Chef, Iron Chef and Ready, Steady, Cook) I have decided to give this cooking lark a red hot go. And what better appliance to attempt this with than my Kitchen Aid. To my husband and oldest sons delight, I have been whipping up such delights at the Salmon Terrine, Scones, Muesli Bars, Cakes and other treats. In fact, I find myself searching for recipes that will let me utilise the dough hook and whisking thingo.

Whilst I think I am still a good Apple and Rhubarb pie away from competing in Master Chef (by the way- what was with Lucas' Apple pie effort? seriously dude... ) I am well on my way to providing some lovely home cooked meals for my brood.

And they love what I am producing so that is all that matters!

15 Things

2009-07-08T20:25:00.003+10:00

Inspired by Blogthis here are 15 (somewhat boring) facts about me:

1. I have two middle names
2. I went to university in the US and it was fabulous
3. I was part of a sorority whilst at college and it is *just* like the movies
4. I can never sit with my back to a doorway. Clearly I was a mafia boss in a past life
(just on that- why is everyone someone famous in a past life? No boring line managers at Telstra or deli staff at the Woolworth's- always Civil War heroes or Mafia godfathers)
5. I would love to be a great singer or be super creative. Sadly I am neither
6. I have a secret love of trashy reality TV
7. I cannot put a paddle pop stick in my mouth. I actually throw out the last part of the ice cream rather than have that wood touch my tongue.
8. I have a benign brain tumor- have had it for 14 years
9. I own more than 120 pairs of shoes (but have only two feet)
10. I have never been to Stradbroke Island but have been all over the world.
11. I sometimes forget which side of the road to drive on late at night or if I am tired. I revert back to where I learnt to drive (ie the US)
12. An essential in my bag when I go out is a pair of flip flops. I am the envy of every other girl standing in that cab line, drunk, late at night with my high heels in one hand and comfy shoes on
13. It has been a while since I have stood in said cab line
14. I have a million business ideas thrashing about in my head but I have no motivation to bring them to fruition
15. I have the most wonderful group of girlfriends in the world

Long time no write

2009-03-31T21:09:00.000+10:00

I pormise more is coming! I am off to Port Macquarie tomorrow so should have some time on my hands then :)

Day One of Swim Squad- and I live to tell the tale...

2009-03-10T11:18:00.003+10:00

Today I decided to venture back into the pool for a swim squad. At Yeronga Pool in Brisbane, Red Dog Triathlon do adult swim squads pretty much every day for an hour. There is even child care on site- perfect!

So manned with my new fins, hand paddles, kickboard and goggles I arrived at the pool with much trepidation. I made a beeline for Lane 1 (otherwise refered to as the 'gumby lane') and pretended that I knew what was going on.

'800 with fins' yelled Trent Patten and off we went. Sadly I didn't hear the 'with fins' part of the instructions and couldn't work out why everyone looked like they were swimming the 800m so effortlessly! Fortunately after the first 100m, another swimmer pointed at my error (after being stuck swimming behind me for 2 laps) and this was rectified quickly!

Well, I was exhausted after the first 800m! And the worst bit? Apparently this was the warm up! WTF! I was already tasting breakfast for the second time that day!! Trent being a pretty good swim coach (apparently he was Libby Lentons coach amongst others) recognised it was my first day and when he sent the squad off for another 800m quietly told me that 600m for me would be fine- well thank god!

But it wasn't over yet- another 400m with kickboard and leg buoys and hand paddles, 400m at 'full pace' and then 200m for at 'moderate' pace. Oh. My. God.

Finally it was over bar the 100m cool down swim.

I am very pleased to say that I lived through it and didn't drown. And the best bit? I am keen to go again on Thursday.

SEVEN

2009-03-08T09:26:00.006+10:00

Seven
I have been tagged by Katy of BeeKaty
The Rules:
1. List these rules on your blog.
2. Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog.
3. Tell 7 unspectacular quirks about you.
4. Tag 7 people at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blogs.
5.Link the person who tagged you.
6.Leave a comment for each blogger.
It could be nice if you post a personal photo with this post.

So here goes!

7 Facts about me:

1. I love tennis

2. Travel is my passion and without a valid passport always on hand I think I might self destruct

3. I am about to turn 35. When I ask you did I become middle aged?!!

4. I have two boys- one aged almost 5 and one 11 weeks.

5. I have lived in the following cities: Brisbane (years..), Augusta Georgia USA (4.5yrs) Wolfeboro, New Hampshire USA (2 months every year for 5 years), Melbourne (1 year) and Hobart (9 months).

6. My many careers over the years have included teaching, corporate trainer, restaurant manager, Cinema Projectionist, International travel consultant, recruitment consultant and tennis coach.

7. I have one sister- Britt, who incidentally has the same name as my one of my closest friends.

7 Unspectacular Facts about Me:

1. I am scared of clowns

2. I can't sit with my back to a door (I think I was Mafia in a past life...)

3. I am in the middle of a post pregnancy diet and have lost 1.75kgs so far with another 4 to go!

4. I despise Bindi Irwin and any child or adult performer who 'over acts'

5. I have never watched a Star Wars movie

6. I haven't eaten popcorn since I worked at Hoyts Cinemas back in 1999

7. I love Country music

7 People I have tagged:

1. Megan from Skinny Megs : http://skinnymegs.blogspot.com/

2. Liss from Frills in the Hills: http://frillsinthehills.blogspot.com/

3. Chantelle from Fat. Mum. Slim. http://fatmumslim.blogspot.com/

4. Skye from Skylark and Son http://skylarkandson.blogspot.com/

5. Bec from Beck Bakes Cakes http://becbakescakes.blogspot.com/

6. Greer from Mefe Art http://mefeart.blogspot.com/

7. Katy from BeeKaty http://beekaty.blogspot.com/

A Recent Photo of Me:

This was taken last Saturday before the Races and I am using it as my diet 'before' pic!

Shhhh... it's a shopping secret!!

2009-02-22T21:47:00.003+10:00

No... not hiding the receipts and the credit card bill. Not even stashing your sale booty in the car and bringing it in piece by piece.. I am talking about finding out about those super sample sales and other 'secret' sales events!

My friend Lesley put me onto a real winner the other day: Mums Grapevine. Mum's Grapevine (http://www.mumsgrapevine.com.au/) will send you a weekly newsletter dedicated to giving mums in the know the inside scoop on where the best sales are for baby clothing, kids clothing and even maternity clothes.

If kids clothes aren't your thing but designer rags are for you, then log onto Missy Confidential. http://www.missyconfidential.com.au/ Missy is particularly good if you are interested in sample sales and other warehouse/outlet sales that are not advertised to the general public. Missy also lists all the current online sales in all shopping categories: Women's, men's, Kids and housewares.

Destination Style (http://www.destinationstyle.com.au/) aims to bring designer clothes to all women at high street fashion prices.

http://www.strawberrynet.com/ is the one stop online shop for all discounted cosmetics. Once you have shopped at strawberrynet once, you will boycott the department stores charging full retail price for your skincare, make up, cosmetics and perfumes !

Frockshop is another favourite for online bargain hunters. http://www.frockshop.com.au/ Frockshop stock discounted stock from designers such as Josh Goot, Juli Grbac, Nicola Finetti, Zimmerman and True Religion. Whilst not exactly 'bargain prices' for most folk, they do have a great range of local and overseas designers in the one place.

I will add my disclaimer now: I will not be held responsible for increased credit card bills, increased online shopping nor the complaints from the little dude driving the white van delivering packages to your home every day.

Happy Shopping!

Beer, Bucking Broncos & Bikes

2009-02-09T19:54:00.009+10:00

Last weekend we went out to Oakey. For the uninitiated Oakey is about 2 and a bit hours West of Brisbane yet a whole world away! Oakey has 3 pubs, one post office, an IGA supermarket and a Chinese restaurant called Henry's Chinese (quite possibly not his birth name!) Speaking of name origins, Oakey was named, rather unimaginatively, after the river oaks on the nearby creek.

The reason for our journey you may ask? The Oakey Two Day Criterium Bike Race. This was to be Alex's debut bike race- a little bit of a departure for a triathlete but one he was keen to trial.

Basically, a Criterium is a 40 lap bike race where all the action happens in the last 2 laps. From what I can gather from a spectators point of view, the first 40 laps are merely for optimum positioning for those final 2 laps. Just to keep things interesting for the spectators and cyclists alike, there are also several "Primes" which are random one lap races with prize money throughout the initial 40 laps. Alex thought he'd give one of these a go (well why not!) and came 2nd which is not a bad effort for a cycling newbie! (Alas no prize money for 2nd place!) With the overall race, Alex finished in the middle of the pack- very respectable!

Now Oakey also had another attraction last weekend- The Oakey Rodeo. Having never been to one we thought we would have a look. Wearing our distinct city clothes (me in dress and pretty gold sandals, Alex in longish shorts and leather slides on his feet) we couldn't have broadcast that we "weren't from around here" if we took out a flashing billboard sign above our heads! Everyone was wearing the obligatory cowboy hat, blue jeans, RM Williams boots and driving their Ute. The beer flowed (in the fenced off licensed area) and stalls sold the must have items such as Confederate Flags, Rum Pig license plates and beer coolers with various alcohol brands on the side.

The whole experience was surreal- bulls, beer, cowboys hats and country folk a plenty. The winner of the day was this guy and his Ute. I think I made his day when I asked if I could take a photo of it!

The Beer Pen:

And last but not least, the actual Rodeo:

All in all, the weekend was a blast!

Some of my Favourite Online Shopping Sites

2009-02-05T23:28:00.011+10:00

Here are a few of my favourite online stores.

Knitwish is an etsy shop owned by my very good friend Rachel. Together with her Mam in the UK, Rachel creates knitted kitsch dolls and baby items. I personally love the knitted Mary Jane shoes and the baby legs. Below is another favourite: the English Bobby

The website is: http://www.knitwish.etsy.com/

Another favourite is Mefe Art by Greer Ferguson. I recently bought a beautiful Blue Bunch Up Bracelet (pictured below) from Greer and I am constantly getting comments on it. The website for Mefe Art is: http://www.mefeart.etsy.com/

Tikiboo Kids ( website: http://www.allyouneed.com.au/ ) is the brain child of Kathryn and is made right here in Brisbane. The Tikiboo range is cute and functional and very reasonably priced. What I love about Tikiboo is that your child will certainly not be dressed the same as every other kid in the playground. Tikiboo Kids has some gorgeous and unique boys clothes in bright colours. Such a welcome change from the navy, khaki and black usually found in regular stores once your child moves out of a size 4! Below are two of my favourite Tikiboo items (note the very cute model!)

If you are in the Brisbane area, then check out Mathilda's Market for new and exciting children's clothes by local deisgners: http://www.mathildasmarket.com.au/ I also beleive they are in other capital cities in Australia.

Please feel free to add any of your favourite online stores.

Today's Online Purchases

2009-02-05T20:50:00.009+10:00

I simply can't help but spend money on kids clothes. The fact that I have a closet (well two actually) full of clothes doesn't seem to stop me in the slightest.

Here are today's purchases for Will and Hugh. The little Guitar shirt is from Gymboree in the US for Hugh, the Giraffe organic cotton Top and Pants for Will are from Gymboree as well.

For Will I bought these gorgeous Calvin Klein onesies and matching Country Road shorts from my mothers group Buy, Sell, Swap forum. All are new with tag but I got them for an absolute song!

Thank goodness I don't have a girl or I fear we would be broke with all my impulse online shopping!!

Snnoooooozzzzzeeeeee

2009-02-05T20:44:00.004+10:00

Is there any wonder that sleep deprivation is used as form of torture for POW's? I am quickly recalling just how hard those first few weeks of having a newborn baby can be like. The constant crying, the constant jobs that need to be done and the complete inability to simply lie down and take a nap when things get too much.

Apparently staying awake for a 24 hour period with limited sleep has the same affect on the body as having a blood alcohol level of 0.10. That is two times the legal limit! Other fabulous things that lack of sleep can cause:

Reduced alertness
Shortened attention span
Slower than normal reaction time
Poorer judgement
Reduced awareness of the environment and situation
Reduced decision-making skills

and the list goes on.... Do you reckon I can blame reduced decision making skills on my choice to eat that block of chocolate I just inhaled??

The 50 Book Challenge

2009-02-03T19:56:00.007+10:00

This year I am part of a reading challenge. If you are a detective or simply used your powers of deduction, you will have guessed that it is a 50 Book Challenge by reading the title of this post.

I usually have no problems flying through books but have never really successfully logged what I have read within a year (or any other time frame for that matter).

The idea with the challenge is to push yourself to read more, not necessarily only read the literary classics. I other words, I take this to mean chick lit is totally fine and counts!

So here is my list of read books so far:

January:

1.Bleachers- John Grisham
2.Breathe- Tim Winton
3.Queen of Babble- Meg Cabot
4.All Because of You- Melanie ?

5.The Other Woman- Jane Green

6.To Love, Honor and Betray- Kathy Lette

7. Mommies Who Drink- Brett Paesel

8. Eucalyptus- Murray Bail

9. Secrets of Married Women- Carol Mason

February:

10. The 19th Wife- David Ebershoff reading now

11. Raising Boys- Steve Biddulph reading now... very reluctantly

On order from the library:

Beautiful people Holden, Wendy.

Rumour has it Mansell, Jill.

How to break your own heart Alderson, Maggie.

Tempted : an It girl novel Von Ziegesar, Cecily.

Wild swan De Blasis, Celeste.

Send me a lover Mason, Carol.

The slap Tsiolkas, Christos

When the Hipchicks went to war Rushby, Pamela

I dream of Magda Laszczuk, Stefan

I also belong to a book club with some girlfriends. We usually try and meet every second month or so and take turns to host and choose the book for the group. Last meet we read Eucalyptus by Murray Bail and I loved it. It was definitely not a book I would have chosen had it not been the book for the group.

I am hosting the next discussion, and have selected We Need to Talk about Kevin by Lionel Shriver for the girls.

Movies based on Books

2009-02-02T21:17:00.001+10:00

Are they ever any good? Can you think of a single book that has been adapted into a movie that is better than the novel? I can't. I really can't. I am watching The Devil Wears Prada right now and it really isn't a patch on the book.

Take Gone with the Wind for example. Margaret Mitchel's Civil War classic is one of my all time favourite books. The movie whilst also a classic just doesn't quite capture how wonderful Scarlett OHara is, or how deep her obsession with Ashley and later Rhett Butler was.

Can anyone think of a movie that is actually better? I challenge you to think of just one...

2009-02-02T20:08:00.002+10:00

Well... here I am.

Somehow I have a blog. At any rate I have a URL that has a name that I picked. As for the actually blogging part I confess right here and now that I have never done it before and really am unsure as to the whole deal with it. So, rather than knock it I figured I would give it a red hot go. So we begin.....

About me. Because of course you will be enthralled with the minutiae of my life right? I am in my mid thirties (ps..when the hell did THAT happen!), have two gorgeous boys aged 4 and a half and 6 weeks, a stupid golden retriever and a husband who is a triathlete and cyclist. I am usually a Recruitment Consultant but am lucky enough to have a year off for maternity leave.

I love tennis, travel, shopping, cupcakes, reading and all forms of crap reality TV shows.

I am not a fan of peas, clowns, bees, Australian drama (with the exception of Underbelly) or my very noisy and inconsiderate neighbours.

I love nothing better than getting together with my lovely friends and belting out a few SingStar songs. It has become a regular event with my girl friends and we completely love it. We all sing along to every song and practically fight over the microphone for our turn. We all have 'our' song that we simply must do each time. Is this part of being middle aged when I would prefer a modern day karaoke to actually leaving the house and going to a club or pub or live music venue?